you know what I love about growing older? how roles shift. I am not going through a mid-life crisis, I'm going through a mid-life SHIFT. my role as a mom shifts, my daughter's roles shifts, my sep-husband's role shifts for me.

my sep-husband has become the brother I never had. after living together and being husband and wife for thirty years, we share fond memories of when we were young together, we give each other tips on dealing with or dating the opposite sex, we pride ourselves in our daughter's successes like a new pet puppy's successes on a wee-wee pad. (pet owners can relate to this sense of love and adoration), he witnesses changes in my physical body from an over-the-clothes point of view (inflating and deflating, sagging and stretching, though, in different ways). we have actually, on occasion, caught each other in our underwear and had found ourselves about as un-aroused as we were two years before we split up. there will be no mercy fuck here. no passionate, horny, why-the-hell not sex here. that was never our forte anyway. jeez, what the hell WAS our forte anyway?? though we don't share the same blood, he is like a brother to me, and like all loving, dysfunctional families, I will always love him no matter what stupid choices he makes for himself. He is my daughter's blood family, therefore he is mine. having said that, I will struggle with these thoughts, like any family member, when his actions drag us along or down with him. Thanks, Dad, I got that from you!

I'm going to post this on my "things about me" when I eventually succumb to dating websites. Men that run? shallow assholes anyway. men that respond? hmmm could be my future sep- husband!!

Next up...if it ain't stiff, it ain't worth a...and other matters of the over 50 male.